Gone Fishing

I’m back from my writing and dating sabbatical.  Did you miss me?  Hopefully I’m refreshed, rejuvenated, and ready to jump back in with both feet into this wonderful world of dating.  My renewed energy has got me thinking.  Dangerous; I know.  Dating is a lot like fishing.  You need patience, good bait, and a strong line to reel in that mighty big fish.  Sometimes even with all the right things; you still don’t catch a thing.   Sometimes it’s just not your day.  Humor me as we delve deeper into this “gone fishing” theory.

Patience

We live in an “I NEED IT NOW” world and the universe wants us to wait for the right person to come along?  Is the universe crazy?  Patience is a virtue that most people don’t have.  We’re so busy focusing on what we don’t have and why we don’t have it that we miss an opportunity that’s staring us right in the face.  What we should be focusing on is making sure that we are doing everything we can to be ready for when the right opportunity presents itself.  Make sure your mind, body, and spirit are in alignment.  

We need to slow down and enjoy the stillness.  I’ve said this before and I will say it again.  Had I met "THE ONE" during the past couple years – I would not have noticed, appreciated, or known what to do with him.  Live your life.  Take that trip.  Spend time with the people who matter.  STOP and I mean STOP focusing on what you don’t have or being envious of what others have.  You never know what goes on behind closed doors.  No one’s life is perfect…even those who have found “the one”.

Have Good Bait

When it comes to dating; everyone has their wants, must haves, and deal breakers.  Some people’s lists are realistic.  Some of them will leave you scratching your head.  Some of them will leave you wondering what planet they are living on.  Think for a moment about what bait YOU are putting on your line.  For example, you might say you want someone who is athletic.  Are you athletic?  What bait are you using to attract someone who is athletic?  Are you sharing photos and stories of you hiking, working out, and being active?

Side note – Athletic does not mean you took a brisk walk once.  Describing one’s self as athletic leads people to assume that you’re active in sports, outdoor activities, working out etc.  Be honest when describing yourself as it does set an expectation for the person viewing the profile.  Eventually if all goes well - you will end up meeting each other.

We know the opposites attract thing can work however it’s important to be truthful with what is really important to you when it comes to matters of the heart.  If you want someone making 6 figures (with the commas in the right places) – be  prepared that this person is probably going to work long hours and may not be able to just drop everything at a moment’s notice.  What kind of finances are you bringing to the table?  Does your work ethic align with theirs?  Again, you have to have right bait to get a fish to grab hold of the line.

Strong Line

We all get so excited when a fish finally grabs hold.  Instinctively we jump into action and start trying to reel it in.  You’re fighting, pulling, and yanking that rod in hopes of not losing the fish.  Sometimes we catch ourselves fighting so hard to reel in that fish that we miss some important details like “Is this even a fish?” and we end up catching a toilet seat.  All that work for nothing.

Have you ever found yourself so excited to have met someone…anyone, that you overlook some important facts?  This is one of the most common ways to end up with a toilet seat.  How do you know that this is the right person if you have not taken the time to get to know them and to let them get to know you?  Stop trying to reel someone in so fast and take the time to get to them.  How many times has that fish taken your bait and left you hanging?  Now you’re tired, annoyed, and have no fish to show for it.  I hope this has given you some things to think about. 

Happy Fishing!